Vulnerability and Frustration makes us Grow

hey Y'all!  I am coming to you today in a state of "AAGGGHHH".  Does that make sense?  

I have awaken each morning, for the past 4 mornings, with a headache and have had the same dream each night.  This dream is questioning my ability to "keep it all going".  It has been rough y'all.  I do not function well with a headache.  Yesterday on the way to school, I told my kiddos that we were going to play quite mouse and no music would be on either - I needed total silence.  This morning I smell like the inside of a peppermint patty - I have doused myself with peppermint essential oils in hopes of alleviating this lingering headache.

So what do you do when you are having a bad day, or a bad 4 days?  You call your momma!  We chatted for a while this morning and she pointed out  something very helpful... growth comes with growing pains!  In the last 6 months, I have decided to grow my business by creating this platform, have had hard conversations with co-workers and contract holders in regards to my duties and responsibilities, and it is the end of the year so all things HOLIDAYS are on my radar! 

so after a 20 minute conversation of me coming up with 1000 reasons why i think these dreams keep popping up, I finally open up about how vulnerable i feel right now.  I have always been someone who is not afraid of hard work but I am one that does not like change, and right now that is the only thing i am feeling.  I look around and see the fact that as i get older, as my kiddos get more involved in activities, as i grow in my relationship with God,...as life just simply continues to happen -  i am need help.  I have never needed help before, i could do it all on my own.  I could be the wonder woman i created in my mind.  And now... i can not!

I have to arrange someone to pick up the kiddos when I have scheduled something outside of their "school" times  (side note - neither of my kids are in school but we call it that because it makes this momma feel better about paying someone else to watch my littles during the day).  I can rarely get a fresh supper on the table every night and keeping the laundry clean is something that my sweet grandmother offers to come do for me because i simply can not seem to stay ahead of it.  

Why?  why is it that as we grow we can't keep up?  maybe we never did before but we were so stubborn or naive to realize it.  with growth comes growing pains.  it is hard to admit that i need help to keep all the things in the air.  sometimes it is even painful but life makes it necessary!  Do you think that maybe that is how god intended it to be?

i think about other cultures and how they run their lives.  when i lived in Germany, it was amazing to me that they took such a long lunch - like 2 hours if i remember correctly.  in tribe like cultures, moms are not left alone with their newborns....ever really. - the entire tribe comes together around that new mom and helps her care for her newborn.  why is it that we seclude ourselves in all circumstances?  

Although it is hard to say, I am coming to terms with the fact that i simply cannot do life alone.  I have to allow those that i love and love me to be helpers.  I have to allow them to give where they can - is that not the point of life?  to help those who need help and learn to lean on Jesus in all things.  If i can not learn to lean on my amazing family - my husband, my parents, in-laws, grandparents that i am blessed to have in my life. - then how in the world will i ever learn to fully lean on Jesus? 

"I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

The purpose of this platform is to help you build a Purely Nutritious life - and I believe that this is one of the keys to creating it.  Life is all about being with, trusting, relying on, and lifting others up.  Allow yourself to be leaned on and yourself to lean on others in your times of need.

We can do this thing called life, we just simply have to do it together!

Devon Jenkins